Mother....have you no shame?!

Oh the indignity, the inhumanity! What you see above my friends, is not a sad baby. It is not a confused baby. It is not a moping baby. No. What you see above is a baby who is trying desperately to poop! You might wonder, “Why Mallory, would someone take such a picture of you?” Well dear friends, it is because my mother – Mommy Dearest if you please – is a monster! I have no privacy! Sure, I guess I should “thank” her – if thank is the right word – for deleting the video of this event which she took at the same time. I guess I should “thank” her for not embarrassing me any more than she already has. So, mother, thank you for not airing my clinched fists, my pushing grunts, or my smile of relief when my “gift” had been delivered….such gross perversion.